this is not a poem #3

I used to
find comfort in words
and words used to flow
so effortlessly

now sweat breaks
on my forehead and
I choke on my thoughts
as I lie in bed

and how many times
a day am I to
tell me I’m okay

how are these haunted
words once innocent
to cure my
crushed and fragile soul

they hurt and they say
it is good
say I write better
when I don’t think straight

but what do they know
do they wonder how
hard breathing can be

is it just me who
thinks about breathing
such an awful lot
you’d say it’s such a

useless thought

how dare you offend
my dear thoughts
there’s no comfort in
my pile of words

but I’ll say
whoever told you
breathing was easy
was a fucking liar

Can you tell I’m not feeling well? I don’t know if it’s the stupid cold or the wisdom tooth which suddenly decided to remind me that it exists. Sometimes I wish I could crawl out of my head. And then the thought scares me. And it goes on and on…

7 Comments Add yours

  1. mehumm says:

    Somedays breathing is the most difficult thing ever and it’s all about just getting through the day. I hope it gets easier for you.
    Beautifully written ❤️

    1. mrsreckless says:

      Thank you so much, this means a lot ❤

  2. Tantei M.Gin says:

    How is it that even in on of your down days, you still write beautifully? I do hope you get well soon.

    1. mrsreckless says:

      Thank you for your kind words. I guess it helps when I put my emotions on paper.

      1. Tantei M.Gin says:

        You’re welcome. Keep writing. Your pen and paper will never leave you.

  3. Kristina Cox says:

    I relate to your last bit so much! And I love this poem a lot! You’re not alone. Thank you for sharing such wonderful words!(:

    1. mrsreckless says:

      Thank you for reading! It’s comforting to know I’m not alone with these feelings. Take care ❤️

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